This site is a disaster horrible sloppy mess weird grouping waste of space collection of things with stuff. If you’re looking for clowns who can make balloon animals or monkeys wearing fez caps and little vests… well, you might have better luck checking some other site like Craigslist or heading to the circus. I make no guarantees there is anything here that is worthwhile for you, but you may be amused by some of what you find.
Yesterday I found out that I had a small concussion and whiplash. It bothers me a lot when I’m hurt – I can’t do all the things I want to do and have to “rest” – not by choice. It also makes me feel vulnerable physically, which then transmits through me to my emotional sides. I had a pity party of one and talked it out with a friend. I don’t remember everything I said but I know I felt crummy but conflicted because all the things that have been going on have been going on for so long – that I’m almost used to the limbo. Used to the uncertainty. Used to being uncomfortable. Doesn’t mean I’m happy in this state. Just that I’ve accepted it. I can still complain though… and that’s ok.
Today I started wondering if I shifted my attitude towards some of the things I’m doing if that would make the fears and anxiety decrease. So today I’m tossing around the idea of – What if I’m enough, my house is enough, my life is enough… and anything else I choose to change, add, improve upon is just for fun? or play?
Simple example: I have enough shoes and sneakers – if I buy another pair it’s just bc I like them and they are pleasant. But I don’t need them because I have enough.
Go make that more poetic because I can’t. I’m a little loopy.